Reading Fail Post

Because I waited far too long to allow myself to enjoy the literary pulpiness that is Twilight, I decided to get on the Fifty Shades of Grey bandwagon early.  My book club is also discussing this particular novel in September.   I also thought that it would be something mindless that would contrast against scholarly readings that I am doing for my current course.  So there are three reasons why I downloaded something classified as an erotic novel to my iPad.  Actually - I just thought of a fourth reason.  I thought I would "flush" if I had to wait in line at Chapters to buy something from the erotic novel section.

I also shamelessly enjoy series of books.  Stieg Larsson's The Girl Who __________ ?  Devoured in summer of 2010.  The Hunger Games, Catching Fire and Mockingjay?  One weekend this fall.  And the before-mentioned Twilight, Eclipse, New Moon Breaking Dawn?  Not only did I barely sleep the weekend I read those - I don't think I showered.  More Edward.  Less hygiene.

Here's what my problem is with Fifty Shades of Grey.  

It's not any good.  Since it's based on Twilight fan fiction, I'll briefly defend Stephanie Meyer.  The Twilight series had a particular appeal to it.  I will admit this:  it was no masterpiece, but it had glimmers.  Briefly, here are some things that make me accept the series.  There were parts of it (the werewolf parts) that reminded me of Joseph Boyden's Three Day Road.  There were parts of it that had significant and interesting irony (Bella's father is one of Forks' finest.  Vegetarian vampires.  Jacob imprints on a half-vampire infant).  There were parts of it that made me laugh (specifically, the parts with Alice).  I would even watch the movie adaptations again.  

A friend of mine used her Kobo to count up the number of times the word "crap" appears in the first book of the trilogy.  93.  The word "flush"?   100 times.  Maybe the book was attempting some kind of self-satire?   Let's not forget the angst Ana feels while using his toothbrush or her repeated and constant insecurity with her appearance.  

Here's another thing.  What would I be watching, exactly, if Fifty Shades of Grey was on Netflix?  

I am off to peruse iBooks.  I'm not sure how I'm going to get through Book Club in September because I don't think I can talk about this book with people I work with.